A woman's secret...

So I have always said that men need the three B’s to be happy in life:

B- Beer

B- Boerewors

B- Boobs

Yes, it really is that simple. Everything a man wants fits into one of these three categories. 

Beer includes all forms of entertainment. Drinking with mates, drinking with mates while they watch sport, drinking while they play sport, drinking while they pretend to listen to your problems, drinking round the braai, drinking while they partying, drinking while they chilling, drinking while they watch T.V, just drinking generally. OK, and for the teetotallers, it includes all of the above without the liquor, although not quite sure how teetotallers don’t need alcohol when listening to lady issues. You have to admit we ain't easy when we moan. Tip: let your man have fun without you, after all he lets you shop.

   

Boerewors includes ALL food. By the way for non- SA readers, boerewors is a South African type of sausage that literally never fails to keep any male stomach ache placated. They always say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. I wholeheartedly agree. A hungry man is an grumpy man. So basically keep your man well fed, ladies. They don’t want sunflower seeds and lettuce. Tip: buy steak, lots of it! P.S for the veggies by lots of starches... LOTS!

Boobs. Well need I say more. The key ingredient to any mans well being is a good feel up. Whether its imaginary or real. Lets be honest. A guy that has access to the luuuurve is happy. Deny, and you deny the beast. And then the beast gets mad. We don’t want a mad beast, not now, not ever. Tip: invest in a push-up bra! 

Sadly as women we are slightly more complicated… And so I implore all woman who find the uglier sex complicated, ITS NOT THAT COMPLICATED! Stop complicating your life with something that is this simple! Just keep reminding yourself to encourage continuous happiness of the three B’s and you are guaranteed a happy man.

It’s that simple.

Kisses,

Namaste,

Ciao,

God Bless,

Love,

Michelle

xxxx